Grapes, Women and Relativity
Sunday, March 16, 2008 at 20:30
Posted by Marcel Strigberger
This past week was not a good week for London, England accountant Alexander Martin-Sklan. He sued Marks & Spencer for 300,000 pounds after slipping on a grape. The judge dismissed his action saying that although there was crushed grape stuff on the plaintiff’s shoe, he was not persuaded that the grape caused the slip and fall. His Honour made this profound legal comment: "In my judgment this was one of those accidents that could happen to anyone."
Now isn’t this judge worth being nominated for the Lord Denning prize in judicial analysis. After all, it is a known fact that grape pulp on a shoe gives you added traction. If you want good balance, forget rubber soles. I’ll take grape skins anytime.
Then again the I’d say the plaintiff was in part to blame for his misfortune. He was self represented.
The worst part is that the judge also hit Martin-Sklan for Marks & Spencer’s legal costs, 20,000 pounds worth. That’s about $40,000.00 Canadian.
But Martin-Sklan’s troubles pale to Eliot Spitzer’s. The former New York governor paid $4,000 to call girl Ashley Alexandra Dupre per round of her services. Ashley, aka "Kristen", charges $1,000/hour. That’s big money. I can’t think of a single lawyer anywhere who charges any sum close to that number. I am always thinking about how to drum up business in my law practice. For starters, I am seriously considering changing my name to Kristen. Hey, we do make a difference. Just ask Martin-Sklan.
Which brings me to Albert Einstein. His birthday was on March 14th. So if you were born this day in 1978, this makes you 30 years old. Then again, it’s all relative. Professor Einstein would likely say not necessarily. If you put your hand over a fire for a minute it feels like an hour. On the other hand if you are with a pretty woman, an hour feels like a minute. I guess this gets us back to Eliot Spitzer. At $1,000/hour, if it feels like a minute, what are the proper charges? It's an argument.
And isn’t it appropriate that Einstein’s birthday, 3/14, is known as “Pi Day”. This has certainly been a week of numbers. And I just can’t stop thinking about that $40,000 costs award against Martin-Sklan. By now we all know what that can buy.
Now isn’t this judge worth being nominated for the Lord Denning prize in judicial analysis. After all, it is a known fact that grape pulp on a shoe gives you added traction. If you want good balance, forget rubber soles. I’ll take grape skins anytime.
Then again the I’d say the plaintiff was in part to blame for his misfortune. He was self represented.
The worst part is that the judge also hit Martin-Sklan for Marks & Spencer’s legal costs, 20,000 pounds worth. That’s about $40,000.00 Canadian.
But Martin-Sklan’s troubles pale to Eliot Spitzer’s. The former New York governor paid $4,000 to call girl Ashley Alexandra Dupre per round of her services. Ashley, aka "Kristen", charges $1,000/hour. That’s big money. I can’t think of a single lawyer anywhere who charges any sum close to that number. I am always thinking about how to drum up business in my law practice. For starters, I am seriously considering changing my name to Kristen. Hey, we do make a difference. Just ask Martin-Sklan.
Which brings me to Albert Einstein. His birthday was on March 14th. So if you were born this day in 1978, this makes you 30 years old. Then again, it’s all relative. Professor Einstein would likely say not necessarily. If you put your hand over a fire for a minute it feels like an hour. On the other hand if you are with a pretty woman, an hour feels like a minute. I guess this gets us back to Eliot Spitzer. At $1,000/hour, if it feels like a minute, what are the proper charges? It's an argument.
And isn’t it appropriate that Einstein’s birthday, 3/14, is known as “Pi Day”. This has certainly been a week of numbers. And I just can’t stop thinking about that $40,000 costs award against Martin-Sklan. By now we all know what that can buy.
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