The past few days have been interesting . Firstly a Superior Court judge forced Toronto Mayor Rob Ford to resign, citing a conflict of interest regarding Ford’s vote on a matter in council concerning his charitable football foundation and involving all off about $3000.00. This follows on the heels of the mayors of Quebec’s 3 largest cities, Montreal, Quebec and Laval resigning recently in the course of allegations of corruption in town.
What does all this mean? I think it is not the best to times to be a mayor. Mayors everywhere must all be asking, “Will I be next?” It would not surprise me to hear a news flash soon that the mayor of Smith Falls resigned after the Ontario Provincial Police raided his home and found 100 cases of contraband Hershey chocolates. “Freeze; hands off those Kisses”.
And in Germany, the government is considering legislation banning bestiality. I didn’t know it was legal to start with. I was wrong. Did you know the government actually legalized bestiality in 1969, permitting same except in cases where the animal would suffer significant harm. But a group called Zoophile Engagement for Tolerance and Information (Zeta) is fighting the proposed ban. Zeta chairman Michael Kiok claims animals can actually show consent. I don’t know about that. I am a Montreal raised city boy and I have never seen horses have sex but I cannot imagine a mare lying around in a stable next to Michael Kiok and lighting up a cigarette.
A couple of day ago, November 30th, marked the birth date of one of my favourite humourists, Mark Twain, who once said, “Always do right. It will gratify some of the people and astonish the rest.” He must have been thinking about mayors.
When I am not pondering about matters such as these, I practice personal injury and family law. Please visit my website,www.striglaw.com . None of my clients to date have been mayors or horses.
Oil giant, BP, will be pleading guilty to charges arising out of that 2010 oil rig explosion in the Gulf of Mexico and as a result will, in addition to civil payouts, be fined about 4.5 billion dollars.
I know readers are tempted to take out the Kleenex at this point. But note that although BP lost about 17.2 billion dollars in the first quarter after the loss, in the last 9 quarters since it has earned gross profits of over 43 billion dollars. That’s better than a kick in the pants.
And I can just imagine the euphoria in their lawyers’ offices when BP execs walked in after the event and retained them. Probably the first directive from the managing partner was,
“OK, we got a big one in. It’s going to keep us busy. No more shoplifting cases for now.”
In addition a federal grand jury has returned an indictment against two high ranking BP officials, charging them each with 11 counts of manslaughter arising out of the tragic deaths of 11 oil rig workers. Of interest is that the grand jury also charged the 2 men with violating the Clean Water Act. I can understand the desire of the prosecution to be thorough and leave no stone unturned but is that misdemeanor charge really necessary? I hardly think it will encourage creative plea bargaining with defense lawyers:
“ Madam District Attorney, our clients will plead guilty to 3 manslaughters if you drop that Clean Water Act charge.”
BP by the way was also charged under the Clean Water Act and, under the Migratory Bird Treaty. I don’t know what that one is but I for one just cannot see a cluster of seagulls sitting around some boardroom table in downtown New Orleans, signing a treaty.
I practice civil litigation with emphasis on personal injury and family law and divorce. Please visit my other site, www.striglaw.com . I have not represented an oil company since 1974.
Seventy year old Mafia boss Joseph Di Maulo was gunned down the other day in front of his home north of Montreal. Of interest is the news story saying he got two bullets in the head, but police are not commenting on the possible cause of death until the outcome of an autopsy.
Now I have heard of being thorough and not wanting to be hasty in giving opinions but isn’t that reluctance to comment about the cause of death a bit too prudent? Do you really need an autopsy to confirm that two slugs to the head was the cause of death? He was OK when he left his house. Suddenly a neighbour hears some gunshots and Di Maulo is on the ground on his driveway. Even the infamous pathologist, Dr Charles Smith would concur on this one. Then again, were he to do the autopsy, there is just as good a chance that Dr Charles Smith would opine that based on his examination of the body, the likely cause of Di Maulo’s death was his mom shaking him too hard.
I practice personal injury and family law when I do not engage in discussions about grisly post mortems. Please visit my website at www.striglaw.com .
Anders Breivik, the man who killed 77 people during a rampage in Norway is serving a 21 year jail sentence. He has sent a letter of complaint to authorities claiming that his treatment in jail is inhumane, in that amongst other things, his coffee generally not hot enough and he does get sufficient butter for his bread.
Seeing that the Norwegians have been very considerate towards Breivik in their sentencing, I do not see why they would not accommodate his requests. After all, doing the math, 21 years for 77 murders works out to .27 years or about 99 days per murder. I have had clients who received more than that for shoplifting. But who’s counting?
I therefore believe the Norwegian authorities should be consistent with their treatment throughout of Anders Breivik and make sure he is comfortable.
Rather than just serve him coffee, why don’t they get him his own espresso maker. I have a Breville machine at home and it makes excellent cappuccinos. Furthermore I think Breivik should be given some choice as one cannot live by espresso alone. In that case why don’t they get him my favourite, a weekly tin of Tim Hortons. And while they are at it, I am sure Anders would enjoy a daily box of Timbits.
As for the butter, we all know Norway major producer of dairy products. In addition to butter there certainly is no shortage of cheese. And for that matter they can serve him cream cheese and another Norwegian favourite, lox. I realize Norway is not know for its bagels but, no problem. What would it cost to fly in fresh bagels from Montreal’s St- Viateur Bagel? Worth every Kroner.
I say if the Norwegian authorities continue their inhumane treatment of Anders Breivik, that he file a formal complaint with Amnesty International. I can just see them chanting, “Breville for Breivik.”
That will get their attention.
While I am not penning legal humour, I practice personal injury and family law. Please visit my website, www.striglaw.com . We do serve geat coffee in our office, but sorry, no bagels.
An article in Popular Science dealing with caffeine toxicity notes that you would have to drink about 6 gallons of McDonalds coffee to kill you. That’s huge. Six gallons will just about fill half the tank in my Lexis.
My question is, how do they know about this lethal limit? I can’t imagine a focus group being lured to McDonalds to test this theory. I would think a test subject would get a bit suspicious after the experimenter hands him a styrofoam cup and a Jerry can.
And why McDonalds coffee? Is there something we should all know? Is there a law suit or two happening somewhere as a result of some unsuspecting customer having a cup of McDonalds java and dropping on the spot? Or are there undisclosed dangers to even exposure to the coffee? Too bad for McDonalds that this story just came out now as I see McDonalds is offering free coffee for a trial period. What’s the catch? Coincidence? Maybe, but I sure as hell am not going near there in street clothes.
When I don't worry about bizarre coffee, I practice personal injury and family law. Please visit my website, www.striglaw.com . Cheers.
The Midwest Book Review has referred to Marcel Strigberger as "an irrepressible humorist with a story teller’s flair for spinning a yarn with true (and hysterically funny) insights into the basics of human nature".
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